Andy Stanley says you’re selfish for not attending a big church. Check out the 2 min video below
Here’s an interesting thought. If you’re not attending a big church, you’re being selfish. In particular, you’re not being considerate about your kids’ future friendships if you’re not going to a church with lots of people. According to Andy Stanley, you should attend a big church for the sake of your kids’ “lifelong” friendships that will be established within age-specific groups.
For example, if you attend a church with high school and middle school aged kids the church you attend should be large enough to create two separate groups because, as Andy Stanley says, it will promote lifelong friendships.
Lots of implications here. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZhhpiU4d0A&feature=youtu.be
After posting this, I discovered Andy Stanley’s apology posted on Twitter: “The negative reaction to the clip from last weekend’s message is entirely justified. Heck, even I was offended by what I said! I apologize.”
It’s good to see that he recognizes his error.
Jason Hovde says
I’m not sure how he backs this up with scripture, since there was none in the clip. Small church = your kids will hate church? A strange conclusion. I mostly have attended (and now pastor) a small church, and I love the church. Age segregation is not going to guarantee your child will love church, nor is a guarantee of good biblical teaching, Christian fellowship and a living faith. Due to the cyclical nature of being in a small town, our church currently only has a few high schoolers, but they seem to enjoy being part of the larger church. Is Mr. Stanley saying that kids in rural areas who do not have access to a large church are automatically lost, or going to hate church? This is pretty sad. I don’t doubt his intentions, but his statements of selfishness could just as easily be turned on the person who scoffs at a small church. In fact, we are called to be content, I think this includes the body of Christ we are privileged to live the life of faith alongside of, whether it is a huge church with lots of programs, or a small church that consistently builds disciples. I was least connected in the largest churches I have attended and closely connected in smaller ones. I conclude with where I began: What does scripture say on this matter, about the size of the local church you should attend? Nothing, I gather. So we are left to apply the rest of scripture to the issue, and in so doing, I believe we are not being selfish to choose not the church that offers us what our flesh desires, but what our spirit requires. I could say more, but that sums it up.
Win Groseclose says
It is good to see that Stanley apologized for this erroneous statement. Both large and small churches have their merits, but ought one choose a church based on future friendships for their children? I don’t think so. I think that a church should be chosen first on the basis of whether the Word of God is taught and followed. Does the preacher faithfully expound God’s word and does the congregation earnestly seek to apply the Word to their individual lives. That is far more valuable than numbers and programs.
Further, as someone who is a pastor and who prefers a more-intimate small church context (I want to know my members by name and know them well enough to know their spiritual needs as I prepare applications in my messages), even if there are no “peers” for your children, often it is the cross-generational relationships that they can make with older members that will shape them for the rest of their lives. For example, our sound-man is in his 80s and is quite gifted at what he does and has been doing for a generation. More importantly, he regularly mentors youth in how to work the sound board and mics. And that mentoring goes well beyond the technical and into the spiritual on lots of levels, something that has become a significant part of the lives of our teens. And that is something that often will not be the case with large churches with oodles of programs for the youth.
Another perspective at least.
win
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